( A Kashmiri Pandit woman outside a refugee camp in Jammu. Photo courtesy ..Shailaendra Aima )
My short Story ' TARAWATI '
(TARAWATI )
After Ramesh Kumar,
the youngest son of Tarawati was killed
by armed terrorists in Kupwara Bazaar,
her family felt frightened. Except Ismail Gujri, no neighbour or fellow Pandit
visited their house to sympathize with them and offer their condolences. They
could not weep or wail over this tragedy. Except for six families, almost
entire Kashmiri Pandit population of the town and adjoining villages had left
in panic when the armed terrorists started
killing innocent Pandits as their soft
targets.
Ismail Gujri visited
their house at night to offer his condolences. That night he appeared a changed
man. No smile or the usual casual talk. In a hushed tone, he had said this :-
" I have grown up
with your family. To me, Tarawati is like a mother . Late Bobju Ji ( Tarawati’s
husband ) always treated me like his son. I need to tell you the truth. I have
heard in the mosque that Ramesh Kumar was working as informant for the army and
that is why he was killed. Pushker Nath and Makhan Lal could be the next
targets. Why don’t you people leave this place to save your lives. Pandits
started leaving in January and hardly six families reside in this area now. It
is May now and things are going from bad to worst. Our children are moving with
strangers now. We have no hold over these young boys who hold a gun in their hands. They say all
Pandits are Indian agents and work as army informants or Mukhbirs. I can believe
that all the Pandits who were killed over here by these gun wielding boys were innocent. I know Ramesh Kumar had nothing
to do with the army but who will tell them. Better you leave this place as early
as possible. Forget this house, the orchard , the walnut trees ,the cows and all the material belongings. Save your life first
. I will take care of your property. I didn’t come during the day time because
we are under scrutiny ”
That was sufficient
for Tarawati’s family to feel frightened . Next morning, they left at 4 a.m. in a truck
that Ismail Gujri arranged for them. The truck had two more Pandit families who
boarded at Handwara town. The three families sat along with their luggage on
the backside of the open truck. All along the road right up to the Banihal tunnel, the truck was subjected to
frequent checking by men in uniform
deployed at many Nakaas.
“ Who are you? “
"Kashmiri Pandits
“
" Where are you
going?"
“ Jammu “
" Move “
At Udhampur, the
driver stopped the truck near a tea stall and suggested to the occupants on the
backside to have tea or snacks and go for the toilet or washroom if they so
desired. No one dared to come down from the truck. They remained huddled with
their paltry luggage. None sitting on the backside of the truck knew where to
go in Jammu. The tea stall owner brought some tea for the shell shocked
families and suggested them to go straight to Geeta Bhawan in Jammu.
At about 7.30 p.m., they
reached Geeta Bhawan . Jammu was hot even at that time. Tarawati understood how
hot it would have been during the
daytime. She was tired, hungry and disturbed. Death of a young son, leaving
everything behind and then landing in uncertainty made her terrible. She had
once been to Jammu on way to Haridwar. Jammu was a pleasant stop at that time.
But now, Jammu appeared a place of embarrassment and suffering to her.
Geeta Bhawan was
crowded with many families using it as a makeshift/temporary accommodation.
Tales of pain and suffering were being narrated everywhere. One could see Kashmiri Pandit
leaders managing the cries and the queues. These leaders were flooded with
requests for accommodation by hapless Pandit families pouring into Jammu from
various corners of the Kashmir valley. Tales of killings, curfews, hunger and
want could be heard all over. At Geeta
Bhawan , a hall had been partitioned
with bed sheets and Saris to create temporary privacy for the refugees arriving
from the Kashmir valley. One could see kerosene
stoves in the makeshift kitchens, whistling pressure cookers in open, men in
sleep under ceiling fans, discussions, noise , news and leaders helping people
to get themselves registered as migrants to avail relief and rations . For
Tarawati, uncertainty hung on all sides.
After their arrival in
Jammu, Tarawati had suddenly turned a recluse. Her world shrank to her sitting
space inside the Geeta Bhawan hall. Sometimes she looked towards the ceiling
fan and sometimes towards the crowds around her. Unable to relate to the
changed environment, she felt as if she was a prisoner or even worst than that.
In Kupwara, her day started at 5 a.m. and she slept at 11 p.m. Everything in
her family was under her command and control that included the kitchen, the kitchen garden, the mustard crops, the fruit orchard, the walnut trees, the cows and the paddy
storeroom. In Jammu, she had nothing to do yet her sleep had vanished . She had
lost her authority and identity. It was Pushker Nath’s wife, her daughter in
law, who took major decisions the day Tarawati’s family landed at Geeta Bhawan
in Jammu.
At Geeta Bhawan, the
family had to stand in a queue for use of the washroom. And the only privacy the family had
created in Geeta Bhawan hall was a cloth partition. The mattresses, the
kerosene stoves, buckets and some bedding provided by some social organization
were prized possession for Pushker Nath’s family now. Aashoo and Dimpy, his
children, were more than happy in the openness of the Geeta Bhawan compound. Jammu meant lack of
restrictions for them. They were delighted to see busy Raghu Nath Bazaar,
Parade Ground, Jain Bazaar, Raj Tilak Road and Sabzi Mandi. Cheerful faces on
the roads were something unusual for them . Quite often, Dimpy would pose
strange questions to Krishna Ji, her mother :
" Mummy! why
don’t people keep quiet on roads? They are always talking and smiling. Why are
they talking in matadors? Aren’t they afraid of the Mujahids? When shall we go
to school? Who lives in our Kupwara house now? Why didn’t you bring Lil ( fond
name of the cow that the family had in Kupwara ) and Nika ( calf ) to Jammu? We
have no cow here. Why don’t people wear Pherans over here? I will also not wear
it now. Please tell Papa to bring Amroodh ( Guava ) from Subzi Mandi. Why
didn’t you get it in Kupwara for us? Mummy, Aashoo is eating Moongfali
(groundnut ) that he buys from Reddiwala on the road. See his pocket. He will
again get fever ."
After migration,
Pushker Nath wanted that all the family members stayed together at one place in
Jammu. He desired to take a two-room set on rent so that his mother and Makhan
Lal (his unmarried brother ) could use one room while the other could be used
by his family. This proposal was summarily rejected by his wife when he tried
to seek her concurrence. She told him this:-
"Why do you
oppose Amar Nath Vaishnavi Ji’s suggestion. Vaishnavi Ji knows many influential
and helpful persons. He is, after all, a selfless leader of our community. He
has already found a job for Makhan Lal at Kathua. Let Mata Ji and Makhan Lal go
to Kathua. They will get monetary relief and rations from the government. And
then Vaishnavi Ji has already got both the nephews of Mata Ji adjusted at
Pathankote and Amritsar. He has provided them with free accommodation. I have
heard all that he was suggesting about Makhan Lal to you. At Kathua, he was
assuring you about some rent-free factory accommodation. Why do you oppose? You
are not a gazetted officer. You are a peon. You have your own family. You have
to educate two children. That should be your priority now. Our life is over.
How many mouths shall you feed with your salary? You will not get any
government relief. It was a different story in Kupwara. Here in Jammu, you
don’t own an orchard. You don’t grow vegetables. You don’t grow rice in your
fields. You don’t get firewood or kitchen fuel free. You don’t get edible oil
from your crop. You don’t have your cows to give you free milk. Think something
about your children now. I will manage in one room. Look for a single room at
the moment. No one can come to live with us if we have one room. How much rent
you will pay and then what shall you give to your family? Let Mata Ji look
after Makhan Lal. Say yes to Vaishnavi Ji. Follow my suggestions else throw
your own family in Tawi river .”
A search for a
suitable room had begun. Pushker Nath visited many localities in Jammu but
nothing materialised. Getting accommodation was a tough job those days. More
than fifty thousand families had suddenly come to Jammu from the Kashmir valley after the selective killings of
the Kashmiri Pandits by the armed terrorists. When he saw a 12 by 10
feet room at Paloura top, he was more than satisfied. For his family, this 12
by 10 feet room was a future bedroom, living room, kitchen and lobby , all in
one. The room had one window (2 feet by 4 feet ) and one door ( 3 feet by 6
feet ). An old fan hung from the
ceiling. Pushker Nath’s family was required to share the toilet in the
courtyard with the landlord’s family. That was more than sufficient for Pushker
Nath at that moment. He immediately gave an advance of rupees five hundred to
the landlord, Balbir Singh Manhas.
Balbir Singh Manhas had removed all the broken furniture from this room that
was being used as store . Had not Kashmiri Pandits arrived in Jammu, Balbir
Singh planned to make it a cowshed.
After Pushker Nath
moved to the rented room, Tarawati went to live with Makhan Lal, the younger
brother of Pushker Nath. At Amar Nath Vaishnavi’s intervention, a social organization
had secured a salesman’s job for Makhan Lal at a shop in Kathua market on a
monthly salary of rupees seven hundred. Makhan Lal now lived in an abandoned
industrial shed ( number 33 ) in the Kathua Industrial Estate. Two more
Kashmiri Pandit families from Mattan were living in this abandoned structure
that had three rooms and a small hall. Tarawati and Makhan Lal moved to the
vacant room that must have been used as a godown. The hall had some rusted old
machinery , old tin boxes , dusty cardboard boxes and some old unused wax candles.
It appeared that shed no 33 had been a candle manufacturing unit. Everything
was full of dirt and dust now. Khem Raj Gupta, a social activist from Kathua had built a makeshift toilet cum
washroom near this structure and restored temporary electric connection for use
by the newly arrived Kashmiri Pandit families. For cooking and washing, the
inmates of shed no 33 used a nearby hand
pump . The families lived free in this shed.
It was June and
unbearably hot. Despite that, Tarawati cooked food for Makhan Lal and washed
his clothes. Quite often, she felt dire need to drink some cold water but there
was no way out. Makhan Lal had purchased an earthenware pitcher for cooling
drinking water .
Tarawati kept herself busy by cooking food and washing
clothes at the hand pump. Two sets of Pherans, a PVC sandal and a photograph of
goddess Sharika was all that Tarawati possessed at her new
shelter. At daytime, the asbestos sheets over shed no 33 brought all the heat
down into the room. At night they had to bolt their room door from inside. The
lone door of their room could not be kept open for fear of snakes. Ventilation
was poor. Shed number 33 was never built for human habitation. Tarawati could
hardly sleep for a single day in this shed.
In the shed,
Tarawati’s new neighbours were from Mattan. One family consisted of a father
and son who were always on the move. This family had no female with them. Their
room was locked for about 20 or 25 days in a month. They were Purohits (
priests ) who kept visiting their Yajmaans ( patrons ) in Himachal Pradesh and
Punjab. The other family consisted of a husband and wife and a disabled child.
The husband had been a peon in some private school at Mattan while his wife was
a non-Kashmiri , a Thakkar Rajput from Paddar, Kishtawar. Her name was Pushpa.
Pushpa understood Kashmiri words but could not converse in Kashmiri language .
No family had a refrigerator or a cooler to beat the intense heat of June in
Kathua region of Jammu.
And then one day
Makhan Lal told his mother that he had seen Monji / Kadam ( Kohlrabi ) in Kathua vegetable Mandi.Tarawati was delighted to know it. It
connected her immediately with her roots. She remembered how she would go to
her kitchen garden in Kupwara and pull out five or six fresh leafy Monji /
Kadams ( Kohlrabi ) and cook them for the family. Every member of the family
relished dishes cooked by her. She thought of her lost authority. She thought
of her closely-knit family at Kupwara. She thought of Ramesh Kumar her youngest
child who fell to the bullets of some cruel gunmen for no-fault. And Ramesh
Kumar was fond of Kohlrabi and rice cooked by his Mother.
" I must cook
Kohlrabi for Makhan Lal. I will also give it to the family living in the
adjacent room. They will relish it ." This thought suddenly cropped up in
her mind and she decided to go to vegetable Mandi herself.
The Gorkha Chowkidar
of the nearby ice factory in the Industrial Estate was known to the Kashmiri Pandit families living in shed
33. He lived inside the ice factory along with his wife. Sometimes, he would
give some ice to the inmates of shed no 33 during and that created a strong bond of goodwill
between him and the Kashmiri Pandit families. This Gorkha Chowkidar was fondly
known as Bahadur by many locals. None knew his real name. Tarawati decided to
seek help from Bahadur for buying Kohlrabi from vegetable Mandi , Kathua. When
she saw Bahadur, she told him:
" Bodhur , monjji
sabzi mandi kothva me laata. Vathh na pataa “
( Bahadur, I want to
buy some kohlrabi from Sabzi Mandi but don’t know how to go there )
Bahadur didn’t follow
what Tarawati wanted to convey. It was Pushpa who intervened and explained to
Bahadur what exactly Tarawati wanted to buy.
Next day Bahadur sent
his wife along with Tarawati to Kathua in the auto-rickshaw that had come to collect
ice slabs from the factory. Bahadur and his wife would also go to Kathua Bazaar
for purchasing vegetables once a week. Any auto-rickshaw or load carrier
carrying the ice slabs from the factory to the market would drop them in the
main Bazaar.
Inside vegetable Mandi, Tarawati was delighted to see green
leafy Kohlrabi. She bought 2 Kg. She also bought some Pudina ( mint leaves ),
green chillies, half a litre of curd and some bananas. Bahadur’s wife suggested
that they return on foot taking a short cut via Parliwand as no direct
transport service was available to the industrial estate. It was hot and the
midday sun was just sending fireballs down from all sides. Bahadur’s wife and
Tarawati walked about 4 Km in the open sun through dusty roads that had no
shady tree. She felt an acute headache and got tired by this journey.
Entering her room,
Tarawati drank some glasses of water as she had been feeling a little thirsty
and uneasy. Somehow, she managed to cook Kohlrabi and made Chutney from the
mint leaves adding some crushed green chillies and curd to it. It was 3 p.m..
She had no energy to cook rice or have her lunch. She felt her throat turning
dry and decided to lie down and sleep. She could neither sleep nor stay awake
comfortably. With a rapid pulse, she thought she had a fever . Her body turned
hot and her face red. She felt like vomiting and experienced a strange numbness
in her arms and legs. She had often experienced headaches that resolved with a
tablet of Paracetamol. But this time it was something different and her
headache did not recede with Paracetamol tablet that she swallowed. She felt a
state of confusion and tried to eat a banana but had difficulty in swallowing.
When Pushpa saw
Tarawati, she understood that something was wrong with her. She told her
husband who went to Bahadur’s room and sought his help. When Bahadur, his wife
and Pushpa’s husband came, Tarawati had fainted on ground .She was breathing
rapidly. Her entire body was red and dry.
" Mata Ji ko loo
laga hai . Hospital jaldi lena hai. “
( Mata Ji has a heat
stroke, she has to be rushed to hospital.)
That was what Bahadur
said when he rushed out and brought his factory’s load carrier. Supported by
Pushpa’s husband, he took Tarawati to District Hospital, Kathua and got her
admitted in the ‘Emergency Ward’.
Makhan Lal was
normally expected to return to shed no 33
by 8 p.m. ,so Pushpa’s husband
went to his shop and informed him about this sudden development. Makhan Lal
immediately rushed to the hospital. By then Tarawati had been examined by the
doctors who diagnosed her problem as a serious case of heatstroke. Makhan Lal
was confused to see his mother with minimum clothes on her body. She was lying
unconscious. She was being given water sprays under a full blowing air fan. Dr
Gupta, the attending physician took Makhan Lal to a corner of the ward and said
:
" Are you her
son? "
"Yes sir "
"Your mother is in
a critical condition. A miracle should happen for her to recover. Her brain,
kidneys and muscles are involved. Her body temperature is 107 degrees
Fahrenheit at the moment. We are giving her intravenous fluids. We are trying
our best to lower her body temperature by fans and cold water sprays. She is
dehydrated. Yesterday only, four elderly Kashmiri Pandits died in Jammu Medical
College, hospital from this fatal heatstroke. You should not have allowed her
to move out in heat especially at midday time. I believe our Health Department needs to come out with an
advisory in local newspapers to protect ignorant people from heatstroke ."
Makhan Lal felt sad
and gloomy with what the doctor had told him. He passed on this message to his
brother from the hospital’s landline telephone and Pushker Nath also rushed to
Kathua hospital. Tarawati died next day early at 8 a.m.The brothers brought her
body to shed No 33. Bahadur informed his factory owner about what had happened
who in turn organized Tarawati’s cremation through some Kathua based social
organisation. Tarawati’s nephews at Pathankote and Amritsar were also informed
from the ice factory’s telephone.
Before cremation,
Pushker Nath had spoken to his wife and advised her to inform her brother Omkar
Nath about what had suddenly happened in the family. He expected some help from
Omkar Nath at that critical juncture. Omkar Nath was a semi-literate young man
who had secured the job of a caretaker in some newly constructed religious
Ashram at Dumana on the outskirts of Jammu city. He was also provided with a
room to stay by the Ashram management.
After the cremation of
Tarawati was over, the brothers left for Jammu boarding a Punjab Roadways bus
outside the gate of Industrial Estate complex, Kathua . Inside the bus, Pushker
Nath felt sleepy but some thoughts kept disturbing him. Where shall he immerse
the ashes of his mother that were required to be collected after two days ?
Where shall he perform the day today
mourning? Where shall his relatives come for the mourning as his 10 x 12 feet room was not
sufficient even for his own family? Where shall he perform 11th day and 12th day rituals of his
deceased mother?
All along the journey,
Pushkar Nath felt miserable. He kept cursing his fate and also the gunmen who
drove them out and put them in this great misery. He was hungry and exhausted.
Next day many
relatives of Tarawati read about her demise in “The Daily Excelsior” that
carried an obituary like this :
OBITUARY
Smt. Tarawati Pandita
wife of late Dina Nath Pandita originally a resident of Kupwara presently Shed
No 33 ( old candle factory ), Industrial Estate, Kathua left for her heavenly
abode. She breathed her last in the District Hospital, Kathua on June 17, 1990.
The tenth day Kriya
shall be performed on June 26, 1990, at Canal Road Park ( opposite Labhu Shah's
milk shop ) at 8.30 a.m. Mourning shall be held at Nirankari Ashram, Dumana
Jammu (near Petrol Pump ). Mourning from Maluen ( parental ) side at Ashok
Kumar Dass Care Royal Medical Hall, Dangu Road, Pathankot and Pran Nath Dass
Care Kashmiri Shivala, Katra Sher Singh, Amritsar.
Krishna Ji and Pushker
Nath Pandita
( Daughter in law and
Son )
Care Balbir Singh
Manhas, Paloura Top, Jammu.
Makhan Lal Pandita
(Son )
Care Shed no 33,
Industrial Estate, Kathua .
Ashok Kumar Dass
Pran Nath Dass
( Nephews )
( Avtar Mota..Jammu ..1991 )
.
.
