THE
STITCHING NEEDLE OF MY
MOTHER
(
Bekas used to say,
“Each joy I wear
Its sleeves are either
Too short or too long,
Too loose or too tight
On me.
And each sorrow I wear
Fits as if it were made for me)……………….. (
Sherko Bekas …Kurdish Poet )
Wherever I am.”Some decades back, In Kashmir , every Rani, Lakshmi, Janki, Parmeshwari,
Chaanda, Gauri ,Dhanwati ,Shubhawati, Benjigir, Raj Dulari or
Benitaeth was poor. These women were engaged in service , sacrifice and
implementation of ruthless selflessness. They had to work
from 6 a m till 11 p m. All these
women cooked food, washed utensils, washed clothes, did house cleaning
and other allied domestic work apart from maintaining family ties
.They were the first to get up from sleep and the last to sleep in
their families .Even if they were unwell, they followed this
routine. A set of Pherans or Sarees , a sandal and a Dejhoor given
by parents was their material possession in the family. They
ate last of all and quite often there was little food left for them to
eat. Their worry was to provide for all except their own self. They
would burn wood and cowdung for cooking and inhale the harmful
smoke . They inhaled the harmful smoke of the saw dust burner known as
Kosh Dammchul .Displaying an affectionate smile even in pain, everyone in their
family expected service and comfort from them .They believed in nothing beyond
selfless service and personal sacrifice. That was their Dharma and Karma.
During some serious crisis in the family, these simple women
passed on endless love, affection, compassion and comfort to all. Even if
they were illiterate, these women remembered every line of AdI Sankara's
Devi Stuti or Panchastavi or Hanuman Chaalisa. They
remembered Lal Vaaks and lyrical verses of Arinmal,Habba Khatoon and
Rasool Mir. Tears trickled down their eyes when they sang some
Leela of Krishen Joo Razdan or Parmanand. These women remembered
everyone's birthday. They remembered the Shradha of every deceased
member of their family. None knew when they were born. The conjugal bliss
was unknown to them . For them , married life meant service ,surrender,child
bearing , sacrifice, compromise and self neglect. They had no time to
think beyond these things. These women were from my family . They were related to me . A mother,
a grandmother,a Maasi ,a Maami ,a Bua or an aunt. They lived in my neighbourhood
or in the families of my friends.This tribe is nowhere to be seen now.They don't
make such people anymore in a world that is driven by values of
utility and expediency.
I had only two white shirts for my school uniform. After i hit my head against the railing of the Jogilanker bridge, one of my white shirts was torn. I was left with only one shirt . Thereafter , everyday , my mother would wash and iron this lone shirt after i returned from the school . Never did I feel that I had only one shirt. She had learnt tailoring as well at her parental home . Every month she asked my father to bring her a sewing machine. It was beyond his means. And then she bought a piece of white poplin cloth from Malik cloth shop near Jogilanker bridge.This type of credit was repaid by her from the meagre monthly household expenditure .
And one night, I saw her stitching a white shirt for me with needle and thread. She had carefully cut the white Poplin cloth to make a shirt out of it.Next day , she gave me a new hand stitched shirt for my uniform . For many days ,as she served us food, I saw her three bruised finger tips .She had injured them with pricks that the stitching needle gave her. A time came in my life when many such debts could be repaid to her but she was nowhere around. She had left this world .To this day, the stitching needle that she used for stitching my shirt, remains somewhere deep within my heart unable to stitch the old wound .
" Meri har gazal ko ye aarzoo
Tujhe saj saja ke nikaaliye,
Meri fikr ho tera aaina
Mere naghme hon tera pairhan." …………( Firaq Gorakhpuri )
( My lyrics have just one aim
to show you forth in finest form,
Mirror your image in my thoughts
Clothe you in melody sweet.)
(Avtar Mota …. )
CHINAR SHADE by Autarmota is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 2.5 India License.
Based on a work at http:\\autarmota.blogspot.com\.